bored at work

Though I usually am and enjoy the free rein access to the Internet- there's another reason for it lately.

My co-workers have stopped talking to me. I'm not saying we were chummy before but the well of kindness seems to have dried up.

I think this is because I'm leaving.  "Well duh!" you may think but that is the paradox of this place. We're a 'team' but we work very independently. When you take a vacation it's great because you will come back to nothing. There's no piling things in people's boxes here- we are customer oriented to the 1000th degree. The flip side of this is that when you are not on vacation or otherwise present when others are not (ie someone resigns) you have that much more work to do. I mean, I find it silly that I would be disliked because I'm leaving the state but that appears to be the case.

It's all the more odd because last week at this exact time, the co-worker I like the best gathered us all up and we went out to Chili's (the only place near work) for an after work thing. We've never done this and it was in the spirit of wishing me farewell. It was awkward and because I don't drink I ate a bunch of spinach/artichoke dip. This helped neither the mood nor my waistline.

I suppose I'm leaving the way I came in- mistrusting and disbelieving the office atmosphere of false cheer and camaraderie. 

DEUCES!!

Even more reason...

I am NOT saying that all white southerners are the same, nor are all Oregonians the same. BUT this snippet from the AP just told me what I figured all along. I am so curious about how the November election is going to go.

Just 45 percent of whites in Kentucky said they would vote for Obama in a matchup with John McCain in the general election — underscoring a challenge facing Democrats in the fall campaign.

Racial attitudes were also striking. About one in five whites in Kentucky said race played a role in choosing their candidate — on par with results in other Southern states. Nearly nine in 10 of that group backed Clinton — the highest proportion yet among the 29 states where that question has been asked.

Only 29 percent of whites in the state who said race was a factor said they would vote for Obama should he oppose McCain in November.

All that contrasted with Oregon, where a majority of voters called themselves liberal.

According to telephone interviews with the state's voters, who cast all their ballots by mail, 57 percent of whites were backing Obama. The Illinois senator and Clinton were evenly dividing working-class whites — those who have not finished college — a group that has decisively stuck with Clinton in most states this year.

In addition, only one in 10 voters in Oregon said the race of the candidates was important, one of the lowest proportions in primary states this year. They were evenly divided between the two Democrats, but heavily backed Obama when he was pitted against McCain.

As the battle for the Democratic nomination finishes its fifth month, there were signs some voters are looking beyond the contest's end.

Just over half in Kentucky said they expect Obama to win the party's nomination — including one in three Clinton backers. In Oregon, three quarters predicted Obama would be nominated, including just over half of those backing Clinton.

Like most states, Kentucky displayed the distaste each candidate's supporters had for the rival contender, underscoring a challenge the party will face in uniting its voters for the fall election.

Only a third of Clinton backers there said they would vote for Obama against McCain. Obama voters seemed more forgiving — seven in 10 said they would vote for Clinton.

Heads seemed cooler in Oregon. There, seven in 10 Clinton backers said Obama would get their vote against the Arizona Republican, while eight in 10 Obama backers said they would support Clinton against McCain.

In Kentucky, just four in 10 Clinton supporters favored picking Obama as running mate should she win the nomination. The same number of Obama backers want Clinton to run as his vice president. The question wasn't asked in Oregon.

Further illustrating the two states' differing perceptions, Clinton was seen by most as more honest than Obama and as the candidate who most shares voters' values in Kentucky. The reverse was true in Oregon.

In Kentucky, Clinton dominated Obama across virtually all categories of voters, winning strongly among men, women and whites, as well as people of virtually all ages, income and education levels. Obama took nine in 10 blacks.

In Oregon, the only groups Clinton controlled were people over age 65 and those earning less than $30,000 a year — voters who have been loyal to her almost all year.

 

--AP staff writer Alan Fram
5/21/2008

Loving Day

If my suspicions are correct, my usual (5?) readers are aware of Loving Day.

Brief summary if you're not: Richard and Mildred Loving where a white male and black female who got married in the late 1950s in DC. They were from Virginia but run out of the state because it was illegal for them to actually be married.  They fought this and in 1967 the Supreme Court ruled that these laws were unjust. Loving Day is celebrated nationwide to acknowledge this overturning. It's a little more sad this year as Mildred passed away earlier this month.

This year, I happily noticed, there are about three celebrations that are going on in Portland. The biggest one is always in NYC but I will happily attend at least one of these festivities. Anyone else?


Here's the Portland information:

Portland, OR
DATE: Sunday, June 22nd
TIME: 10:00am
LOCATION: Ainsworth United Church of Christ
YOUR HOST: Ainsworth United Church of Christ
RSVP: information@ocma-multiracial.org
DETAILS: The entire church service is dedicated to the Loving Decision.
MORE INFO: information@ocma-multiracial.org

Portland, OR
DATE: Thursday, June 26th
TIME: 6:30pm
LOCATION: OHANA Hawaiian Cafe (NE 63rd and Sandy Boulevard)
YOUR HOST: Portland International District and Oregon Council on Multiracial Affairs
RSVP: information@ocma-multiracial.org
DETAILS: This series of plays, "This Place Called Home," will be dedicated to the Loving decision.
MORE INFO: information@ocma-multiracial.org

Portland, OR
DATE: Saturday, July 12th
TIME: 12:00-4:00pm
LOCATION: The park blocks in the Roseway neighborhood on NE 72nd Avenue and Sandy Blvd
YOUR HOST: The Portland International District and Oregon Council on Multiracial Affairs
RSVP: information@ocma-multiracial.org
DETAILS: The International Day Festival, an annual event of the Portland International District, has dedicated this year's event to Mrs. Mildred Loving. The Oregon Council on Multiracial Affairs is a sponsor of this event.
MORE INFO: www.pdxid.com

a chuckle, finally

I have not felt much like posting lately. With moving and houseguests and work (oh my!), I've been mentally caput. However, this little piece of silliness made me laugh. I hope it can help you too.

This message has been paid for by the Committee for Maintaining my Sanity.

way too far

This just sheds more light on why I'm leaving GA.

no sorpresa

no vamos al Mexico. esta bien. vamos a llegar en Portland el 13 de Junio.

grief? craziness? carpe diem?

I had a random thought pop into my head yesterday while doing an online Portland job search: Man, I should just move to Mexico and learn Spanish and then I'd be really competitive. The social work jobs there are few and the good paying ones wanted a bilingual person. I promptly dismissed it but then...

I shared said random thought with JC last night. Something in him jumped on board. We discussed and you know what? We just might do it. I don't know what this is...nerves or folie a deux or what but I really, really love the idea. It would mean a postponing the Portland move but wow.

We went over the money numbers and it could actually happen. Leave ATL go to Mexico and move on up to Portland. Maybe this is a result of wanting to DO SOMETHING after Aunt Lizzy died or listening to John Mayer's "Say" too much. Who knows? It may fizzle but I have always wanted to do something like this. I remember talking with Maureen about finding a couple of weeks to go to Guatemala or something. But to spend a couple of months immersed...I don't know...

I did wake up this morning and review my dream: I was working in Portland with my current co-workers. My supervisor came up to me and raved about how much money two of the employees were saving the company because they didn't have to use the translator whenever someone Spanish speaking called. Hmmm..

a better place?

Rest in peace, Aunt Lizzy.

Elizabeth Burgh
1920-2008

My great aunt passed away yesterday. I've been fairly sheltered in terms of death. I've lost my grandfather. Both grandparents on my father's side and several cousins. I knew Aunt Lizzy a great deal more than any of these other people though. She was not doing so well - dementia, narcolepsy and a busted hip. It was clear she wanted to die. She quit eating and spent most of her time asleep. I feel regret because I didn't see her this last time I was in NYC. I have less than kind thoughts about her granddaughter, with whom she lived, since she basically overtook Aunt Lizzy's apartment and her social security checks. She's a drug addict and once referred to JC, as I later learned, as "a goofy looking white boy". All that aside, I wish I had just let go of the hate and gone to see Aunt Lizzy. She probably would have been asleep but it would have been nice to give her one more hug.

We just never know.

I just like to think she's with her husband somewhere. He was a baker. Maybe they're sharing some buns and coffee. She loved those.

boundaries

these are far easier spoken and read about than implemented. i've had many opportunities lately to try and prove myself. i continue to struggle. that's always a good sign though. again, i'm reminded: be careful what you wish for. seek to change and you'll get the chance to make the change. this has been proven over and over again.

i've been mostly pissy. the raging storm PMS hit kind of hard this month. add that to the general anxiety and stress of making a move during hard economic times and it's been a recipe for disaster. i'm recovering a bit with the help of carbs, comfort food and talk radio. i'm dying for some brownies but i'm countering that with joy i get seeing the scale's movement south. lost another 3 this past week. i'm almost 'moving to new york' weight. that was a good place.

the prom was too much fun. meeting all of my sister and husband's co-workers was such a good time. i haven't 'been out' like that in a long time. the state of youth today continues to depress me though. there were about three pregnant girls electric sliding right next to me. many, in fact, far too many, hit the dance floor in slippers. slippers, y'all. then there was my absolute favorite of the night. twin sisters. they had their hair all nice and coiffed. they had matching pink dresses - not too scandalous. then you see below the knee. EACH ONE WAS WEARING ONE ATHLETIC SOCK ON ONE FOOT (NO SHOE) AND A PINK HIGH HEELED SHOE ON THE OTHER FOOT. and of course, they had this look going on opposing legs. foolishness.

i've worn a skirt to work today and you'd think my co-workers just discovered i have legs. nope, i've just been vaporizing in and out of my office.

jc and i had a great night last night. we went to our local Borders. they have a great concrete slab of a deck that they have a lot of little chairs and table set out on. it looks towards downtown atlanta and with all the green it was a superb view. we're both freaky, raw nerves and we haven't had a chance to really talk to each other in the last two weeks. i calculated that we get 3 1/2 waking hours on weekdays and the weekend. so it was nice to make the most of last night. we talked our stuff out and were back on the same page.

i didn't get to a movie but i did get to a diner. the food was 'eh' but it was a nice time out with jc, my sister and niece. i honestly can't stand my niece around my mom anymore. the dysfunction is epic.

i suppose i should do some work although knowing i have a mere three weeks is not very motivating.

no job for you!

Going, going, gone.

Email received from my old supervisor:

Yeah- its bad, very very bad.  However- Washington County is working hard to preserve the services and there still might be a job available for you when you come out.  It just wont be for Cascadia. 

Thanks Eris for thinking of us

bad timing

My supervisor may not be able to hire me after all.  This is baaaaad news.